To the Jerk who stole my laptop

I hope you read this. I know you are a male because only a guy would bash in my car window and take only my briefcase leaving a 12 pack of sprite, two packs of cigarettes, my tax information, two silver picture frames, my three romance novels in the front seat and last but not least a clinic bag full of makeup. If a woman had broken into my car she would have taken all that stuff.

So, by now friends I guess you have realized that some twerp with no balls, (I hope his willy falls off by the way-if you're reading this) broke into my car and stole my laptop.

This really gripes my ass. Sorry for the cussing but it can't be helped. It happened last week and now I have my door fixed, and the window has been replaced but you stupid little ingrate if I didn't have copies of my works in progress I would so hunt you down like the slimy little pointy headed demon that you are get my laptop back and sew your fingers together so you could never pick up anything ever again.

The good part is I didn't really have much on my laptop. Most of all my work is done at home and I am diligent about making back up copies of everything and then I also have hard copies because I'm just annal like that.

But still...it's the principal of the matter. You hurt my car and that pisses me off more than anything. And I miss my briefcase. I really do.

So...If the person who stole my laptop just happens to read this blog. A pox on you and all your kin, may you have warts on your private parts and may your toes go together and your teeth turn black and may you never ever have sex again....

Okay, I think I feel better now....
More posts to come. Oh, and I wrote pages. Pages people. I actually wrote pages today. I'm so proud. It's taken me a long to get back to this point but I did it. I broke through the barrier and I'm so very happy....